Archive Page 2

04
Feb
08

I really want one of these…

Predator Diorama

Yea, I know I hated Aliens Vs. Predator: Requiem, but I’m still a fan of the two Predator flicks.

If anyone wants to drop a $150 to keep me happy, you can click here and make the purchase.

02
Feb
08

Common consideration and parenting…

Those two phrases seem to not go hand in hand.

At least not from what I had happen last night.

I was at work, having a so-so night when I got a table of 2 adults and 3 kids. Happens all the time, no big deal. They were kind of pushy, but nothing that I couldn’t take since I do this every day.

Everything goes smoothly, they run up a tab of about $140. I was hoping for a fat tip from that because I provided them with some decent service if I must say so myself.

They pay and are leaving. I approach the table to start cleaning it off when the one older woman comes back to the table and says…

“Oh, the one little girl had a throw up accident.”

I just looked at her like she was an idiot because she definitely was that.

Not only did they have the nerve to leave me a whopping 10% tip, but they also had the nerve to leave vomit at my table. I’m a rational man who believes that if something like that happens, it’s your duty as a parent to take care of it. Of course I’m being too idealistic about it. Once again, I can’t expect too much from some of the simian lifeforms that I serve.

The problem with all of this is that I’m afraid of vomit to the nth degree. I can’t stand seeing it, smelling it or even hearing it. I get panicked and nauseated. It’s the worst phobia I have and I know I’m not alone because from what I’ve read, it’s the number one phobia amongst people.

After much deliberation (and asking other people to clean it up,) I say to myself “how bad can it be?” and get prepared to clean it up myself. They threw a bunch of the linen napkins on the table, so I figured that it was just a little bit and can handle it myself. I get a pair of latex gloves and a trash bag to just sweep what I can in there and throw it away. I get to the table and get down to business and pick up the napkins to find a good portion of the table covered in the contents of this little girls stomach.

Instantly, I get nauseated and want to have a good bout of sympathy puking. I tell my boss that I cannot do it. There’s no fucking way that I can get in there and do this or else I’m going to be puking and need to go home.

Luckily, my good friend, Jon (whom I still owe a beer for his bravery) manned up and cleaned the table completely. He admitted that he has a strong stomach, but even that made him queasy and wanting to hurl himself.

After that, jokes and laughs are being thrown around and it’s business as usual.

If the mother of that little girl ever reads this, fuck you.

Let me say that again, FUCK YOU.

I don’t know what kind of deluded world you live in, but you are responsible for your child’s actions. That includes when they vomit. This is not negotiable. You brought that little miracle into this world, so any action of your child is your responsibility, not mine. I did not make your child vomit, so why did I and my friend have to deal with the consequence of it?

It’s because you’re fucking lazy. If you can’t accept the responsibility of that, keep your fucking legs closed. There’s no reason for it.

And the young ladies and the table next to you said the same exact thing. You’re unfit. Don’t reproduce anymore.

01
Feb
08

Paranormal Activity

I just saw this trailer tonight it has me really curious.

Granted, I don’t believe in ghosts or hauntings, but it’s certainly done with a degree of realism that makes you get a little freaked out.

Here’s a link to the website.

31
Jan
08

Further proof that nothing is sacred…

First CBGB’s, then my favorite coffee place and now the “Black House” that Anton LaVey used for the Church of Satan has been turned into condos.

This world is completely going to shit.

31
Jan
08

Cloverfield in 15 minutes…

Don’t read if you haven’t seen the movie.

Pretty hilarious recollection of the movie.

Also, Matt Reeves confirmed that they’re in talks for a sequel. Maybe we’ll get our fucking explanation.

Now it’s time for me to watch more LOST.

30
Jan
08

Movie Review: RAMBO…

RAMBO!

Wow.

That’s about the three words that I could muster for this.

I like action movies. A lot. I feel as if they’ve toned down action movies as of late so they don’t offend the sensibilities of the delicate people that have inherited the world. Rambo serves as a “fuck you” and an arrow in the throat of what a joke the genre has become in recent years.

Sylvester Stallone managed to make an action flick with balls the size of my house.

You want an anti-aircraft gun tearing people apart? You got it.

You want people exploded from mortars? You got it.

You want babies ripped from their mother’s arms and thrown into burning buildings? You got it.

What you have here is a simple set up. Christian missionaries embark to war torn Burma to deliver food, medicine and bibles to the people who are being ravaged by a merciless army. They find John Rambo in Thailand to take them up the river to deliver these goods. Rambo is a bitter man who just wants to be left alone and live a quiet life, as he’s tired of the world.

After general coercing by a young lady (played by Julie Benz of Dexter fame,) he reluctantly agrees to take them on their trip.

After dropping them off, the military presence comes in and blows the living shit out of anything that moves. Most of the missionaries are killed, those who aren’t are taken into captivity.

The pastor of the church that they are from shows up to have Rambo guide a group of mercenaries up river to find and rescue the missionaries.

I don’t want to ruin the finer plot points for you, but I will say that you see more than ample amounts of shit getting fucking WRECKED.

If you’re looking for Oscar material, look elsewhere. This is a man’s movie and nothing more.

Highly recommended if you’re anything like me and like seeing all sorts of shit blow up and be shredded by .50 caliber machine guns.

A+

14
Jan
08

Terrell Owens crying…

He’s still a douchebag.